By Today, I helped Mama run errands. Before we could even get started the sliding door where the ramp is so I can get myself in and out without assistance malfunctioned again. I wanted to cry. Here we are again, I thought. The other thought racing through my mind was the van is basically new, it should not be having so many malfunctions. It should work well, but here we are again. Making the choice to get myself out of the van so I would not become stuck again, after doing just that I took a breather outside. Sitting in the fresh air and taking much needed, deep, cleansing, breaths of air I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone.
I sent several text messages to two members of my chosen family detailing the situation and my frustration with it. Just as I finished it started to rain. How apropos I thought. I wish I could cry right now, but I cannot. I need to see if I can go help mom now that I am calmer. When I reached mom again, she told me she had reset the ramp and the sliding door by putting them both on manual and then flipping them back to power just like the mechanic had told us to do. Did it work, I asked. By the shrug of her shoulders, I knew she had not tested whether the reset worked.
Shall we give it a try I asked. Mom said we should. Saying a silent prayer, I pushed the button for the sliding door. It worked as it usually does. So far so good I thought. Pushing the button for the ramp it came down as well without incident. Telling God and my angels a silent thank you I get back in the van and push the buttons to make the ramp go up and the door close. When both worked properly, I cheered. It worked fine the rest of the day. However, we plan to call the company that did the modification on the van and ask why this is happening so frequently and what can be done about it to prevent so many future problems.
Today reminded me of lessons I want to share with all of you. The first is the importance of creating the space for a breather in difficult situations. This allows us to think more clearly and self-regulate our emotions. Today also reiterated how incredibly special my relationship with my chosen siblings is and how they are a key part of my getting through life well. We need people who are there for us and allow us to be there for them through thick and thin. A life well lived is one with community.