By Every little girl dreams of being a princess and her prince charming coming in on a white horse. I dreamed of that, too, but then I figured out I was not a typical little girl. Now what happens to my perfect fairy tale when I was born with cerebral palsy? Does it exist? I wondered. I did not have any answers, so I got tough. I hung out with boys, mostly. Not because I was boy crazy, but because the boys did not care I had cerebral palsy and rolled instead of walked most of the time. They just saw me. They just helped me when I asked and when I did not, they let me do it for myself. They made me laugh at myself. They taught me not to let it define me because it does not.
Most of these boys are now chosen brothers. I got to keep the goofballs friends I had growing up. They became my family. They became my protectors and my champions. As we grew older and became adults nothing about our dynamics really changed. We were there for each other through everything, we still are broken hearts, career changes, babies, marriages, cancer scares, surgeries, pneumonia, and on and on…all of it.
My brothers cannot protect me from everything. There are things I have never told some. I was protecting them, too. Also, I never wanted to see the disappointment on their faces. I was protecting my right to grow up, learn, change, fall in love, and fall without them being protected as well. Bullies do not just exist on the playground. They exist in the world of grownups, too. Sometimes, they claim to love you. Sometimes, they are the reason your heart breaks and you are left wondering how you got where you are. What you did wrong. Here’s what is wrong with those questions. They are not the truth. Here is the truth.
1. You did NOTHING wrong. You did not. Hear me, YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. It is not on you. It is on the bully…alone.
2. It is not your fault. You cannot fix a bully. You just cannot. Sometimes, people are mean and evil. There is no fixing them. Sometimes, walking away for good is the right and brave thing to do.
3. There is hope. You can start over. You can do anything you want. Forgiveness is possible. The God I love & serve is in the forgiveness business. You can forgive yourself. You are okay. You just must believe it.
4. This is not the end of your story. It is the beginning of a new chapter. Turn the page and do not look back at the previous chapter letting it define you.
5. Your scars are where your story is. Do not be afraid to show them. Somebody needs to hear your story, so they know it is not the end.
6. You are enough, and you are LOVED. I guarantee it. I am living, breathing, proof of this truth.
All said was so true Stacey Amen