Choosing Positivity Daily Doesn’t Mean my Condition is Easy

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I want to address something I’ve written on before, but I keep getting asked in some form. “Where does your positivity come from? I don’t know how you are.” First things first: I do have bad days. Sometimes, I have a bad week. Usually, when that happens (as is life now and then) I won’t write a blog post. I’ve only blogged about a bad day once in real time…so far. I generally need time to process my bad day/week.

My positive attitude is a choice. I have to make it over and over again every day. It would be so easy for me to be bitter and angry. That’s the honest truth. However, I don’t want to take the easy way out for several reasons. I’ll take them each in turn.

Taking the easy way out doesn’t honor the miracle of my life. I believe I survived when I was supposed to die for a reason. I’m a literal miracle, so I want to do my best to be a good steward of the gift I’ve been given. I get to write my story down for all of you because that’s where my ministry is. I am not trained in theology, but my faith is strong. This means I will NEVER use my faith as a weapon to make anyone feel invalid or unloved. I’m refuse to be that person. I want to show God’s love to as many people as I can. I want to change the conversation around my condition and make a difference in the world. I think I’m beginning to. That realization is incredibly exciting!

In addition, taking the easy way out in my life with CP doesn’t honor my granddaddy Kirk or granny and what they asked of me. Making them proud is excellent motivation. I also want to make my parents proud of me, which is more excellent motivation.

My chosen brother/journey partner needs me to be positive as possible so I can help him do what we call journey work. That is my absolute privilege and so is being his chosen sister. My other chosen siblings help me stay positive too. Their love and support are allowing me to become the person I was always meant to be. I couldn’t do life nearly as well without every one of them.

Lastly, I chose to be positive for myself. I want to be proud of myself and the life I’m creating. I love the woman I’m becoming. I’ve fought really hard to get to a place where I love the person I am and the one I’m becoming. It’s been a process and will continue for the rest of my life.

I hope this blog post answers one of the most frequent questions I get asked. Please feel free to ask me more questions about doing my best to thrive with CP. The answer(s) just might become future posts. However, I reserve the right not to answer if the question(s) is too personal or invasive.

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