My chosen brother/journey partner often says, “There is strength in your tears, Stace.” I used to push back when he said that because I thought I had to be strong, handle everything by myself, keep it in… but then one day thirteen years ago: I EXPLODED. Exploded is written as such for a reason because it was epically, spectacularly, horrible, but cleansing. To his credit, my brother/journey partner never said, ‘I told you’, but listened when I told him the story.
He then said, “We are family. You do not have to carry this burden, or any other alone. Lean on me, on everybody else you consider family. Let us help. Let us in. Cry if you need to. No judgements here.” I say all that to get here: He is right, as he usually is, because his advice is extremely wise. I am much better at feeling what I need to feel than I used to be. It is a much healthier way to live. Suppressing emotions has an enormous impact on my health, wellness, and wholeness.
Feeling what I need to feel is a sign of my healing as well. However, it is still a work in progress and probably always will be. My default is to not talk through what I am feeling. Earlier this year, after my annual dermatologist checkup, I made a commitment to myself to manage my stress better even with the difficulties my immediate family and I continue to deal with. I knew it was in the best interest of every aspect of my health. The most important way to manage my stress is for me to feel what I need to and talk my feelings out whenever they get to be too much.
I share the progress of my health, wellness, and wholeness journey with you all knowing that I am not the only person working on the healthiest, best, version of myself. Everybody wants to be their best, healthiest version. By discussing my challenges, I hope others see that perfection is not possible, but what is possible having the determination to continue to work on being our best selves even when we have a setback.